Stop the draMMA

I am tired of this election season.  I am tired of political Facebook feeds.  I am tired of social media friends trumpeting their political positions.  I am tired of on-line bickering.  I have grown extremely tired of phrases that start with, ‘I am so…’ and end with any of the following words: outraged, horrified, disturbed, offended, triggered, frustrated, appalled, disgraced.  I am just bored of it all; furthermore, I never once participated in this sort of public discourse.  Typically, I find harsh or emotional comments suspect.  And this type of on-line banter likely says more about the person making the comments than it does about the actual subject matter.  

Q:  So what do you do to fend off the negativity?  

A:  Why, I do BJJ of course!  I hit the mats!  I roll!  And I keep rolling.  It doesn’t matter if you are a republican or democrat, Christian or Muslim, man or woman; I have respect on and off the mat.

Q: But what if you are at home, away from the peaceful mats and you need to escape the negativity?  

A:  Why, I read about Jiu-Jitsu on the internets and watch videos that teach me how to choke people!  BJJ is my favorite form of escape...except when it is not:

A few weeks ago an article caught the ire of the BJJ community.  EVERYONE seemed to have an opinion...The Jiu-Jitsu Times, BJJEE, Reddit, Watch BJJ, are among the few sources that reported on Joe McCaffery’s self-promotion from purple belt to brown belt.  From white belts to black, from New York to San Diego, from Wisconsin to Agrabah...the personal attacks and opinions flooded the comments sections.  The negativity was overwhelming.  It must be something in the air.  Keyboard warriors began trumpeting their stances and some people lost composure.  Whether it is politics or BJJ, people just HAD TO have an opinion...And you know what they say about opinions they are like assholes; everyone has one...

On self promotion

I was riled after reading the article about Mr. McCaffery’s self-promotion.  People bleed for this martial art.  Every stripe involved some amount of blood and sweat.  Every promotion received is an honor and blessing (or curse...those first few purple belt tournaments might be a rude awakening for some!).  The path to promotion is arduous and the sacrifices made are significant.  It makes sense that hardworking members in the BJJ community would feel outraged.  Part of McCaffery’s argument was the BJJ community is dysfunctional and broken.  That’s, like, his opinion, man.  AND HE POSTS HIS SELF PROMOTION VIDEO FULL WELL KNOWING THE BJJ COMMUNITY WILL HAVE OPINIONS.  And opinions were made: he was challenged to fights, he was called a hoax, and he was called an embarrassment to the BJJ community.  Based on comments like these, many people felt threatened by the weight of McCaffery’s stunt.  He knew what he was getting into by posting the video.  He knew people would react harshly.  And those harsh reactions only proved the point he was trying to make...DON’T FEED THE TROLLS!  Rather than using words, let the mats be the judge and jury.  If he holds his own with other brown and black belts (at tournaments with a loaded bracket) then isn’t that enough proof?  If his blue belts are crushing it at tournaments, is that enough proof?  

I AM NOT DEFENDING McCAFFERY’S ACTIONS; his self-promotion bothered me.  I did not give myself my Bachelor of Arts degree, nor did I award myself my master’s degree--those degrees were earned according to the standards set forth by the universities I attended.  However, I did become an ordained Dudeist Priest in a click of a button (but that accolade is not present on my resume).  The Dudeist in me thinks that McCaffery’s belt really tied his GI together, did it not?  And that is all it does for him.  He chooses to be a joke or to be credible.  I don’t wish to play the game that he is playing.  If BJJ has taught me anything, it is to never carry the weight of my opponents; make my opponent carry my weight.  McCaffery put this video out there so that we would carry this weight.  Nope.  Not going to carry this.  We don’t need to waste anymore words on the topic.  Respectfully and quietly, place your weight back on him and his students--like you would do to any other opponent, self-promoted or not--let your Jiu-Jitsu do the talking.   Put your energy into your training because words will be lost, but answers will be found.  The mats won’t lie.

"With great power comes great responsibility"

We can and should do more with BJJ in our communities.
by: Jon D. Froh

During a recent women’s self-defense seminar, Stacey (one of the students) shared a story about her aunt.  Her aunt had been in a physically abusive relationship and had sustained a broken back, broken ribs, and a bloodied face.  Fortunately, her aunt survived the attack and removed herself from the relationship.  Her story illustrates that violent predators don’t have to be strangers.  The reality in America is that women are more likely to be a victim of violent assault from an intimate partner.  The frequency of this happens more than you might think.  To put this into perspective there were 6,488 US troops killed in Iraq and Afghanistan between 2001 and 2012.  During that same time frame 11,766 American women were killed by their husband, boyfriend or ex-partner.  Nearly twice as many women had been killed than soldiers that had died in combat; it would appear that the real war is against women.  Our nation is sitting on a problem of epidemic proportions...which added poignancy to the women’s self-defense seminar I taught.  Stacey also shared an empowering story about how she had learned one simple technique during a previous seminar--a simple stranglehold that helped her out of a sticky situation.  Stacey’s stories and the alarming statistics are a powerful rationale to provide self-defense seminars to the women who live in our community.  

BJJ IS FOR EVERYONE
I have been blessed with the opportunity to coach BJJ these last few years.  I have learned so much from the people at our gym.  Together, we have developed a love for this martial art...together we sweat and bleed for BJJ...together we celebrate our wins and lessons.  We show up on the mats each day eager to improve.   And all of this learning has significant value to us as individuals.  Sure, it feels great to hit that double under pass to truck to rear naked choke; nailing those transitions took time!  But sometimes we forget that jiu-jitsu is a martial art designed for self-defense and self-preservation.  Sometimes it feels self-indulgent when we consider all the time spent on the mats.  Sometimes I forget that my specific knowledge is a powerful tool that can not only change lives, but also save lives.

"The best way to find yourself is to lose yourself in the service of others." - Mahatma Gandhi

When we asked our gym members for help facilitating a women’s self-defense seminar, they eagerly volunteered.  The best thing about belonging to a gym like ours comes from moments like this.  Every member of our gym knows the power and value of BJJ.  At one point, I watched John (one of the volunteers) carefully explain the technique to a small group of women.  John was in his element; his precise language and confidence was contagious--he made the women believe they could execute the technique!  Watching your students teach others is a beautiful thing.  After the seminar, John was the first to offer his help to get involved with future events.  Every member of our gym is grateful for the lessons that BJJ has taught us.  It makes sense that these fine men and women would jump at the chance to give back to our community.  Not only were we able to empower women, we donated every dollar earned that day to New Horizons Shelter.  We will continue providing women’s self-defense classes because learning BJJ can change lives and save lives.